18 May 10 Tips for Having an Accountability Partner
10 Tips on How to Have an Accountability Partner
Accountability is a powerful tool to maintain changed behaviors or actions. The truth is that accountability works so well because it forces you to face yourself as your accountability partner acts as a mirror for you. I’ve learned the hard way to be very selective about who you choose as an accountability partner. Be careful who you say “yes” to being an accountability partner. It has painfully cost me friendships I care deeply about on 2 occasions. The reality is this method works so well when you implement it, that if you aren’t actually ready for sustained change it’s going to be a pretty difficult road.
How to Have an Accountability Partner
You can be the best accountability partner in the world and do everything you are asked but if you don’t have some other things aren’t in place it will blow up in your face. The two of you have to be mature enough and have thick enough skin to accept constructive suggestions. That being said Accountability is a Biblical principle and I see it in action here:
As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. - Proverbs 27:17
Here is what I would suggest if you do get an accountability partner.
10 Tips for Having an Accountability Partner
1. When you don’t want accountability anymore you must express it to your partner! Super important! otherwise, resentment and other issues grow between you.
2. Have a regular consistent check-in time/s. Take it seriously.
3. It has to be a 2-way street, not 1 person checking on the other all the time.
4. Be clear upfront on what you want to happen when you do not keep the things you are being asked to be accountable for.
5. Pick a predetermined amount of time. This is similar to #1, without this it just goes on forever, and either you both fizzle out or compromise in your accountability area.
6. Permission and a clear understanding that you each have the right to call each other out and the other person can’t get mad.
7. Pick a plan to follow. Whether it’s working out, recovery, business, or anything else, have a track that both of you will run on for the accountability period.
8. Create goals to reach and celebrate them when they are reached!
9. Be transparent/honest with your thoughts, feelings, emotions, around the area of accountability. If you are not honest with your partner it will be difficult to experience sustain breakthrough or consistency in an area.
10. Establish boundaries – Accountability partners are not for all areas of life. You pick one area, topic, behavior, or goal and focus on that with your partner. It is not an open door for you to speak into all aspects of someone’s life. You have permission within the boundaries you set.
I hope this post on how to have an accountability partner helps someone be more successful with accountability partners than I am. IF I had to pick one aspect of this that is most important and what I acknowledge to be the reason for my failure, it would be #1.
You can do exactly what you are asked to do as a partner but it can go terribly wrong relationally if you don’t practice tip #1. It cost me, good friendships, twice! Be clear that both of you are as serious as possible, because accountability works and you will not like it if you are not committed to embracing change.
Rev. Ron Gelok III, MBA
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